Sorry I haven't sent out one of these missives in a while. There's a lot to report.
First of all, I'm pregnant. Not me, specifically, but my wife and me, which may as well be me because so far, I'm the one with the protruding belly.
You know how they say getting pregnant makes you see things differently? Wow. It's true. Take LA. I mean it. Take LA. I don't want it, not anymore. It's a tough place to be a grown-up. Can you imagine what it must be like to be a kid there?
Sure, there's so much to expose a kid to. Crack whores and homeless guys. Sig Alerts. Valet parking. And I know there's no better place for my child to learn how to tag.
Still, I'm willing to give all that up—to deprive the fruit of my loins, as it were—in order to give him or her a childhood replete with. . . well, boredom.
Hell, it was good enough for me.
No, I didn't grow up in Portland, but that's not the point. My kid is going to have the childhood I wish I'd had. Where apples ripening on the tree hang just above the picket fence for easy picking. Where you can buy a taco after six without being propositioned by young men in mini skirts.
Where it rains.
Call us impulsive, but we went and bought ourselves a house. One with not just an attic but a basement, too, for crying out loud. And a porch. A real, live, porch where you can actually sit on a swing and wave to your neighbors.
And where your neighbors wave back, neither you nor them feeling the need to calculate which one of you might be better connected to David Hasselhoff's ophthalmologist's cousin.
I'm not saying all this to brag. I'm saying this with a sense of astonishment. Places like this really do exist—or seem to anyway. I shouldn't be that surprised. I've traveled. I've shot in Istanbul and Buenos Aires and Detroit. I should know that there are people who don't live like we do. Like we did. Like we intend not to.
And I know that there will be things about LA that I'll miss. The chicken at Versailles, for one thing. The sunshine. Some really wonderful people.
Which brings me to the point of this diatribe. We don't know a lot of people here. So far, we know five. Which is a great start, but we wouldn't mind knowing more.
Is there anyone you can think of who lives in or around Portland that we might get along with? Someone creative, audacious, artistic, opinionated, and fun? Someone who cares deeply about something, whether it's global warming or snowboarding?
If you can think of anyone, please introduce us. Send them my e-mail address, or send me theirs.
Thank you.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Back to crass self-promotion
I had a pretty good week.
First there was the Winner Take All Screenwriting Competition. I won. All.
Not sure all of what, but so far I've gotten two books and a really swell trophy and apparently there's more to come.
Then there's the Masters of Color Photography International Color Awards. I won First Prize in the Nature category, Third Prize in the Fine Art category and this one's so cool it deserves its own paragraph...
Photographer of the Year.
I like the sound of that. Photographer of the Year. Wow.
There's going to be a book (with seven of my shots in it, thank you very much), an exhibition in Brazil, and gallons of expensive champagne--which knowing me, I'll pour into one of those snazzy camera filters I invented and shoot through.
I know I'm not supposed to have favorites, but isnt that just damn neat?
Besides, I've won lots of screenwriting awards. Thirty-one, so far, not even counting all the film festival awards I won for films I wrote and directed.
Which isn't to say I haven't won plenty of photography awards. Last year I was Apple Computer's featured artist. And I won First Place, Third Place, and twelve honorable mentions in the International Photography Awards.
Kind of makes you wonder, though, doesn't it? I mean, seriously, what's really more impressive?
Here's one way to look at it: A picture's worth a thousand words; my liquid filtration photography portfolio has 36 pictures. That comes to the equivalent of 36,000 words, which is just about 50% more than what an average screenplay runs.
Then again, I've written five other screenplays.
But I also have two other photographic portfolios.
This is getting too complicated.
First there was the Winner Take All Screenwriting Competition. I won. All.
Not sure all of what, but so far I've gotten two books and a really swell trophy and apparently there's more to come.
Then there's the Masters of Color Photography International Color Awards. I won First Prize in the Nature category, Third Prize in the Fine Art category and this one's so cool it deserves its own paragraph...
Photographer of the Year.
I like the sound of that. Photographer of the Year. Wow.
There's going to be a book (with seven of my shots in it, thank you very much), an exhibition in Brazil, and gallons of expensive champagne--which knowing me, I'll pour into one of those snazzy camera filters I invented and shoot through.
I know I'm not supposed to have favorites, but isnt that just damn neat?
Besides, I've won lots of screenwriting awards. Thirty-one, so far, not even counting all the film festival awards I won for films I wrote and directed.
Which isn't to say I haven't won plenty of photography awards. Last year I was Apple Computer's featured artist. And I won First Place, Third Place, and twelve honorable mentions in the International Photography Awards.
Kind of makes you wonder, though, doesn't it? I mean, seriously, what's really more impressive?
Here's one way to look at it: A picture's worth a thousand words; my liquid filtration photography portfolio has 36 pictures. That comes to the equivalent of 36,000 words, which is just about 50% more than what an average screenplay runs.
Then again, I've written five other screenplays.
But I also have two other photographic portfolios.
This is getting too complicated.
Friday, May 05, 2006
Canada, the new Brooklyn
After spending the better part of the past two months directing projects in Canada (I've been working in Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, and Ontario), I figured out something amazing about Canada.
It's Brooklyn.
Not Brooklyn the way it is now, mind you. I'm talking the Brooklyn that was. Bubbie and Zadie's Brooklyn. The Brooklyn where hoodlums used to play stick ball in the streets. In fact, just the other day when I walked out the door in Moncton, that's exactly what I saw. Okay, sure, the hoodlums are on skates. And everybody's got a stick. And the ball is a puck. But you get the idea.
Remember New York bagels? Where can you even find a decent bagel in New York any more? Sure, there's H&H. But when you get past them there's... Well, there's that crappy roll with the hole in it you can buy off a cart.
If you've never been to Canada, you're not going to believe this, but the bagels here are--and I'm not exaggerating when I say this--better. Sorry. You New York die-hards are just going to have to suck it up.
And lox. As in Nova. As in Nova Scotia, which is where amazing smoked salmon comes from. The last time a salmon swam up the East River was what? 1837?
You've heard of Montreal smoked meat? Turns out it's made out of pastrami. Or is it corned beef? Whatever. It's every bit as good as the stuff they used to serve at Jewish delis all over Brooklyn. And you pay for it with money that actually looks like money, unlike the goofy new bills they're passing off as money in the States.
This is so remarkably clear that I figure it has to be part of a plan. I mean, we're exporting freedom to the Middle East, the Chinese have the booming economy we used to be famous for, Iceland consumes way more Coca-Cola per-capita than we do, and Argentina's basketball team won the Olympic Gold Medal in 2004.
And suddenly I get it. It's brilliant. This is part of our war on terrorism.
Everybody knows about American manufacturing jobs going offshore. That was just the first step. Now we take everything else that's quintessentially American and move it somewhere else, too.
India gets technology. Chile gets apple pie. Russia gets capitalism. And Japan gets baseball. And the automotive industry. And consumer electronics.
Next time those Al Qaeda bastards try to take down America, they won't find any America to take down. Instead, they'll find an entire country full of fat, lazy, cultureless consumers up to their eyeballs in debt.
Now that's what I call strategy.
It's Brooklyn.
Not Brooklyn the way it is now, mind you. I'm talking the Brooklyn that was. Bubbie and Zadie's Brooklyn. The Brooklyn where hoodlums used to play stick ball in the streets. In fact, just the other day when I walked out the door in Moncton, that's exactly what I saw. Okay, sure, the hoodlums are on skates. And everybody's got a stick. And the ball is a puck. But you get the idea.
Remember New York bagels? Where can you even find a decent bagel in New York any more? Sure, there's H&H. But when you get past them there's... Well, there's that crappy roll with the hole in it you can buy off a cart.
If you've never been to Canada, you're not going to believe this, but the bagels here are--and I'm not exaggerating when I say this--better. Sorry. You New York die-hards are just going to have to suck it up.
And lox. As in Nova. As in Nova Scotia, which is where amazing smoked salmon comes from. The last time a salmon swam up the East River was what? 1837?
You've heard of Montreal smoked meat? Turns out it's made out of pastrami. Or is it corned beef? Whatever. It's every bit as good as the stuff they used to serve at Jewish delis all over Brooklyn. And you pay for it with money that actually looks like money, unlike the goofy new bills they're passing off as money in the States.
This is so remarkably clear that I figure it has to be part of a plan. I mean, we're exporting freedom to the Middle East, the Chinese have the booming economy we used to be famous for, Iceland consumes way more Coca-Cola per-capita than we do, and Argentina's basketball team won the Olympic Gold Medal in 2004.
And suddenly I get it. It's brilliant. This is part of our war on terrorism.
Everybody knows about American manufacturing jobs going offshore. That was just the first step. Now we take everything else that's quintessentially American and move it somewhere else, too.
India gets technology. Chile gets apple pie. Russia gets capitalism. And Japan gets baseball. And the automotive industry. And consumer electronics.
Next time those Al Qaeda bastards try to take down America, they won't find any America to take down. Instead, they'll find an entire country full of fat, lazy, cultureless consumers up to their eyeballs in debt.
Now that's what I call strategy.
Sunday, February 12, 2006
Stuff I'm thinking about on my birthday
Today is my birthday. I'm not in much of a mood to send out another self-promotional career update. I'm being reflective.
I've been thinking about the adjectives people use to describe old people and now that I'm a lot closer to old than young, I figure it's time to give some thought to the ones I want the young whippersnappers out there to apply to me.
‘Spry’ isn’t bad. Neither is ‘eccentric’. And I wouldn’t complain about being called ‘wealthy’. But if I had one adjective, I think I'd want it to be ‘dangerous’.
I’ve never been dangerous.
In junior high, I discovered Led Zeppelin. I'd close the door to my room and crank them up full blast, listening to them over and over as I stared up at the ceiling. Not as some pot-induced psychedelic experience, but because songs like Kashmir were so incredibly innovative, both melodically and rhythmically. I was a band geek.
In high school, I was arrested for dealing drugs, but the cops had to let me off because the vial of white powder I was caught with was actually potassium nitrate. (Yes, potassium nitrate is one of the critical components of gun powder. But I wasn't even making gun powder. I was making smoke so I could analyze the vortex in a tornado chamber I'd built for the science fair.) I was also a science geek.
I never tipped a cow, though there was this one time that I tipped a waiter pretty badly. He took a half hour to take my order, never filled my water glass, and put mayo on my sandwich even after I asked for him not to. I still left him 10%.
The question I ask myself today is whether it's too late to change. I am middle aged, there's no disputing that. So I wonder whether I can spend the second half of my life doing what I didn't do in the first half.
I'm thinking of starting smoking. I want to drive without wearing a seatbelt. I want to carry a gun, or at the very least a Leatherman.
It's my birthday, after all. I can do anything I want.
I think I'll have two pieces of cake.
I've been thinking about the adjectives people use to describe old people and now that I'm a lot closer to old than young, I figure it's time to give some thought to the ones I want the young whippersnappers out there to apply to me.
‘Spry’ isn’t bad. Neither is ‘eccentric’. And I wouldn’t complain about being called ‘wealthy’. But if I had one adjective, I think I'd want it to be ‘dangerous’.
I’ve never been dangerous.
In junior high, I discovered Led Zeppelin. I'd close the door to my room and crank them up full blast, listening to them over and over as I stared up at the ceiling. Not as some pot-induced psychedelic experience, but because songs like Kashmir were so incredibly innovative, both melodically and rhythmically. I was a band geek.
In high school, I was arrested for dealing drugs, but the cops had to let me off because the vial of white powder I was caught with was actually potassium nitrate. (Yes, potassium nitrate is one of the critical components of gun powder. But I wasn't even making gun powder. I was making smoke so I could analyze the vortex in a tornado chamber I'd built for the science fair.) I was also a science geek.
I never tipped a cow, though there was this one time that I tipped a waiter pretty badly. He took a half hour to take my order, never filled my water glass, and put mayo on my sandwich even after I asked for him not to. I still left him 10%.
The question I ask myself today is whether it's too late to change. I am middle aged, there's no disputing that. So I wonder whether I can spend the second half of my life doing what I didn't do in the first half.
I'm thinking of starting smoking. I want to drive without wearing a seatbelt. I want to carry a gun, or at the very least a Leatherman.
It's my birthday, after all. I can do anything I want.
I think I'll have two pieces of cake.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
No, you have not reached Marlo Thomas
Let me start by setting something straight: I'm sick.
Not figuratively sick, which may well be the case. But literally sick. As in, I have a cold. The worst cold I've had since the one two years ago.
The one two years ago was brought about by a 19-hour flight, sitting next to a man who only stopped coughing long enough to swig from a quart bottle of cheap Moldavian vodka.
Two days later, I had his cold, and it probably would have stayed pretty benign if only I’d tried his course of medication. Instead, I ended up tromping around the Baja California desert for 28 hours at a shot, working on 'Dust 2 Glory'.
'Dust 2 Glory', in case you haven’t seen it, is a documentary film about the Baja 1000—an off-road race through the Mexican desert run by dune buggies, dirt bikes, and super trucks with engines so huge and powerful, you can hear them coming from five miles away.
The drivers of those trucks asked me to keep my coughing down.
Is this cold worse? Hard to tell. This time I have a voice, though it's not mine. It's Marlo Thomas'.
In my head, it's actually kind of sexy. But I'm so congested that it's really about the only thing I can hear. It's fascinating the way a single word like 'phlegm' reverberates off the walls of my skull, and I entertain myself for hours by doing little experiments, repeating the same word over and over in different ways to see how long it takes for the echo to die down.
Then I start coughing.
I don’t know if other people do this, but when I get sick, I lose my perspective. One time when I had strep throat, I became convinced that the only thing—the only thing—that was going to make me feel better was popcorn. I singed my eyebrows off in that adventure, and almost set my apartment on fire, but that was nothing compared to this.
This time, the thing that I needed—the only thing that would make me feel better—was 'Lethal Weapon'.
My wife was thrilled. I’m not much for being pampered, and this gave her an opportunity to do something to help me feel better.
It took her six hours to find a store that rents or sells videos in L.A., but she didn’t give up. And when she walked back in the house, I noticed she was wearing ear plugs.
I think she wanted to understand my suffering, to feel how congested I must feel.
She loves me that much.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Not figuratively sick, which may well be the case. But literally sick. As in, I have a cold. The worst cold I've had since the one two years ago.
The one two years ago was brought about by a 19-hour flight, sitting next to a man who only stopped coughing long enough to swig from a quart bottle of cheap Moldavian vodka.
Two days later, I had his cold, and it probably would have stayed pretty benign if only I’d tried his course of medication. Instead, I ended up tromping around the Baja California desert for 28 hours at a shot, working on 'Dust 2 Glory'.
'Dust 2 Glory', in case you haven’t seen it, is a documentary film about the Baja 1000—an off-road race through the Mexican desert run by dune buggies, dirt bikes, and super trucks with engines so huge and powerful, you can hear them coming from five miles away.
The drivers of those trucks asked me to keep my coughing down.
Is this cold worse? Hard to tell. This time I have a voice, though it's not mine. It's Marlo Thomas'.
In my head, it's actually kind of sexy. But I'm so congested that it's really about the only thing I can hear. It's fascinating the way a single word like 'phlegm' reverberates off the walls of my skull, and I entertain myself for hours by doing little experiments, repeating the same word over and over in different ways to see how long it takes for the echo to die down.
Then I start coughing.
I don’t know if other people do this, but when I get sick, I lose my perspective. One time when I had strep throat, I became convinced that the only thing—the only thing—that was going to make me feel better was popcorn. I singed my eyebrows off in that adventure, and almost set my apartment on fire, but that was nothing compared to this.
This time, the thing that I needed—the only thing that would make me feel better—was 'Lethal Weapon'.
My wife was thrilled. I’m not much for being pampered, and this gave her an opportunity to do something to help me feel better.
It took her six hours to find a store that rents or sells videos in L.A., but she didn’t give up. And when she walked back in the house, I noticed she was wearing ear plugs.
I think she wanted to understand my suffering, to feel how congested I must feel.
She loves me that much.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Monday, January 02, 2006
Ah, winter in Montreal!
Greetings from Montreal, where it’s currently minus 15 degrees.
I happen to know that it’s minus 15 degrees because not 20 minutes ago, as I was chipping icicles from my eyelid so that I could look through the camera’s viewfinder, a helpful person opened a window and called out, “Espese d’idiot! Qu’est-ce que tu fais dehors? Il doit faire moin quinze degrés!"
In case you don’t speak French, this translates, loosely, to, “Kind sir, I hope you are warm enough because the temperature is currently minus 15 degrees.” At least that’s what my assistant Gil tells me.
I like Montreal. People are nice here.
But right now, I think you should think about visiting Arizona.
Remember those commercials I shot for Arizona tourism? Well, they’re running.
I want those spots to work.
Not that I don’t think they’ll work. The ad agency (Moses Anshell) does exceptionally fine advertising and I’m not just saying that because they hired me to direct this campaign of spots.
But after having scouted and shot all over the state from Tuscon to Lake Powell, I can say with some authority that Arizona is a magnificent place. The kind of place that not only deserves to have lots of people come visit, but happens to have plenty of wide open spaces to put them in.
Vast and not cold, that's Arizona. Even the ice in your margarita can't get down to minus 15 degrees.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
I happen to know that it’s minus 15 degrees because not 20 minutes ago, as I was chipping icicles from my eyelid so that I could look through the camera’s viewfinder, a helpful person opened a window and called out, “Espese d’idiot! Qu’est-ce que tu fais dehors? Il doit faire moin quinze degrés!"
In case you don’t speak French, this translates, loosely, to, “Kind sir, I hope you are warm enough because the temperature is currently minus 15 degrees.” At least that’s what my assistant Gil tells me.
I like Montreal. People are nice here.
But right now, I think you should think about visiting Arizona.
Remember those commercials I shot for Arizona tourism? Well, they’re running.
I want those spots to work.
Not that I don’t think they’ll work. The ad agency (Moses Anshell) does exceptionally fine advertising and I’m not just saying that because they hired me to direct this campaign of spots.
But after having scouted and shot all over the state from Tuscon to Lake Powell, I can say with some authority that Arizona is a magnificent place. The kind of place that not only deserves to have lots of people come visit, but happens to have plenty of wide open spaces to put them in.
Vast and not cold, that's Arizona. Even the ice in your margarita can't get down to minus 15 degrees.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Well it ain't Cleveland, but then, what is, really?
If you couldn't make it out to the Ohio Independent Film Festival last month, you missed a rolicking good time. Or so I hear. I couldn't make it either, seeing as it was my anniversary and as much as I love Cleveland, I love my wife more.
The good news is that you get another chance to see 'Burning Passion', my film about a guy who ejaculates fire. It'll be playing December 4th in the Novita Film Festival in New York.
If you're keeping track, that makes this the 31st film festival that has seen fit to invite 'Burning Passion' to screen. And while I can't guess whether it'll win anything, the film has already won three Gold Awards, three Audience Awards, two Screenwriting Awards, and a Best Directorial Debut.
By my calculations, that gives 'Burning Passion' a longer run-- with more critical acclaim--than 'Van Helsing', a film which deals with many of the same themes, only they managed to spend more than thirty-two hundred times as much to do it.
If you want to see the film ('Burning Passion', not 'Van Helsing') get yourself over to 288 Elizabeth Street at 5:20 on Sunday, December 4th. I won't be able to make it, so if you're the first person to convince the festival organizers that you're me, you'll not only get in to see the film for free, you'll get two all-access passes that will get you into every film in the festival as well as all the parties.
You might be expected to say a few words after the screening.
I suggest mentioning my being Apple's Featured Artist--the iCard site is still up, by the way, and if you're getting into the movie for free, the least you can do is tell people to dink over to http://www.mac.com/WebObjects/iCards.woa/wa/category?name=art/fea〈=en and send my mom another iCard.
(Hmm. For some reason, the computer puts a square in there where there's supposed to be '〈'. Look. It did it again. How weird.)
Oh. One more thing. If you sent an iCard to the MacArthur Foundation on my behalf, thanks. I may never get one of those genius grants, but at least now they've heard of me.
Here's the link to The Apple iCard Featured Artist Site in case you want to check it out yourself or copy down the URL without that weird square thing happening.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
The good news is that you get another chance to see 'Burning Passion', my film about a guy who ejaculates fire. It'll be playing December 4th in the Novita Film Festival in New York.
If you're keeping track, that makes this the 31st film festival that has seen fit to invite 'Burning Passion' to screen. And while I can't guess whether it'll win anything, the film has already won three Gold Awards, three Audience Awards, two Screenwriting Awards, and a Best Directorial Debut.
By my calculations, that gives 'Burning Passion' a longer run-- with more critical acclaim--than 'Van Helsing', a film which deals with many of the same themes, only they managed to spend more than thirty-two hundred times as much to do it.
If you want to see the film ('Burning Passion', not 'Van Helsing') get yourself over to 288 Elizabeth Street at 5:20 on Sunday, December 4th. I won't be able to make it, so if you're the first person to convince the festival organizers that you're me, you'll not only get in to see the film for free, you'll get two all-access passes that will get you into every film in the festival as well as all the parties.
You might be expected to say a few words after the screening.
I suggest mentioning my being Apple's Featured Artist--the iCard site is still up, by the way, and if you're getting into the movie for free, the least you can do is tell people to dink over to http://www.mac.com/WebObjects/iCards.woa/wa/category?name=art/fea〈=en and send my mom another iCard.
(Hmm. For some reason, the computer puts a square in there where there's supposed to be '〈'. Look. It did it again. How weird.)
Oh. One more thing. If you sent an iCard to the MacArthur Foundation on my behalf, thanks. I may never get one of those genius grants, but at least now they've heard of me.
Here's the link to The Apple iCard Featured Artist Site in case you want to check it out yourself or copy down the URL without that weird square thing happening.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Monday, October 17, 2005
News from the MacArthur Foundation
I know how many people have been eagerly waiting for the MacArthur Foundation's announcement that I'd been awarded a Genius Grant (I love you too, Mom). And I finally have news. Both good news and bad news.
The bad news is that--once again--the MacArthur Foundation saw fit to pass me over for one of their spiffy, million-dollar grants.
Oh well.
The good news is that Apple has chosen me to be their Featured Artist for their iCards.
This means that millions of people can now send virtual postcards over the internet using images I created.
You could send a condolence iCard to my mom. She'd appreciate that (mrsbelefant@yahoo.com). And you can send one to the MacArthur Foundation (try 4answers@macfound.org).
Just dink over to http://www.mac.com/WebObjects/iCards.woa/wa/category?name=art/fea〈=en.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
The bad news is that--once again--the MacArthur Foundation saw fit to pass me over for one of their spiffy, million-dollar grants.
Oh well.
The good news is that Apple has chosen me to be their Featured Artist for their iCards.
This means that millions of people can now send virtual postcards over the internet using images I created.
You could send a condolence iCard to my mom. She'd appreciate that (mrsbelefant@yahoo.com). And you can send one to the MacArthur Foundation (try 4answers@macfound.org).
Just dink over to http://www.mac.com/WebObjects/iCards.woa/wa/category?name=art/fea〈=en.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Like you need another excuse to visit Cleveland
We all keep talking about it, but for one reason or another, we never seem to get around to booking that trip to Cleveland.
Well now we have no excuse. 'Burning Passion', my film about a guy who discovers at 14 that he ejaculates fire, has been invited to play in the 2005 Ohio Independent Film Festival.
The festival runs from November 6th through the 13th and I would recommend going for the entire week.
If you can only make it for one day, 'Burning Passion' screens on November 12th at the Cleveland Public Theatre, which is located at 6415 Detroit Road. The screening starts at noon.
If you want more information about 'Burning Passion' or any of my other work--or you just want to check out my snappy new website design--visit http://www.belefant.com. There's a ink down there underneath my phone number that you can click on to get there.
And if you want more information about the festival, go to http://www.ohiofilms.com. Tell you what. I'll see if I can embed a link to their site down below.
Try this one:
http://www.ohiofilms.com
Hmm. Didn't work. Oh well.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Well now we have no excuse. 'Burning Passion', my film about a guy who discovers at 14 that he ejaculates fire, has been invited to play in the 2005 Ohio Independent Film Festival.
The festival runs from November 6th through the 13th and I would recommend going for the entire week.
If you can only make it for one day, 'Burning Passion' screens on November 12th at the Cleveland Public Theatre, which is located at 6415 Detroit Road. The screening starts at noon.
If you want more information about 'Burning Passion' or any of my other work--or you just want to check out my snappy new website design--visit http://www.belefant.com. There's a ink down there underneath my phone number that you can click on to get there.
And if you want more information about the festival, go to http://www.ohiofilms.com. Tell you what. I'll see if I can embed a link to their site down below.
Try this one:
http://www.ohiofilms.com
Hmm. Didn't work. Oh well.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
My contact in Istanbul
I've always wanted to say that. My contact in Istanbul. Sounds like a secret agent thing.
Anyway. The money's in place and I'm off to shoot my documentary on American expats. First stop, Turkey.
I'll be there for almost the entire month of July, and in between visitng the baths, eating imam bayildi, blowing glass, and haggling over carpets, I plan to break out the camera and spend an occasional hour or two interviewing ex-Americans about their lives--the ones they have now and the ones they left behind.
So two things:
1) if you know any ex-Americans living in Turkey, I could use more subjects. Please either give me their contact information or give them mine. E-mail works best for me because...
2) I'm going to be almost totally incomunicado. I might check my e-mail every few days, but don't even count on that. If you want to reach me, either do it before I leave or wait until I get back.
Meaning late August. I'm going to be directing an ad campaign for Arizona tourism first thing when I get back, so I won't be back when I get back, at least not entirely.
By the way, if you don't know anybody in Turkey, but you know ex-Americans in other parts of the world, please pass their names along to me too. After Turkey, we're talking about visiting Mexico, Argentina, and France.
I know. I truly do have the best job in the world.
Oh. One more thing. The raven flies at midnight.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Anyway. The money's in place and I'm off to shoot my documentary on American expats. First stop, Turkey.
I'll be there for almost the entire month of July, and in between visitng the baths, eating imam bayildi, blowing glass, and haggling over carpets, I plan to break out the camera and spend an occasional hour or two interviewing ex-Americans about their lives--the ones they have now and the ones they left behind.
So two things:
1) if you know any ex-Americans living in Turkey, I could use more subjects. Please either give me their contact information or give them mine. E-mail works best for me because...
2) I'm going to be almost totally incomunicado. I might check my e-mail every few days, but don't even count on that. If you want to reach me, either do it before I leave or wait until I get back.
Meaning late August. I'm going to be directing an ad campaign for Arizona tourism first thing when I get back, so I won't be back when I get back, at least not entirely.
By the way, if you don't know anybody in Turkey, but you know ex-Americans in other parts of the world, please pass their names along to me too. After Turkey, we're talking about visiting Mexico, Argentina, and France.
I know. I truly do have the best job in the world.
Oh. One more thing. The raven flies at midnight.
As usual, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Monday, May 16, 2005
Hear me prattle on the radio.
Prattle is the right word, isn't it? I think it is.
Anyway, I'm going to be interviewed by Les Szekely for the B+ Moviemaking Radio Show, which as you probably know is about making high quality films for not so much money, which is what I seem to be doing a lot of.
The show airs on Wednesday, May 18, from 4:00 pm to 5:00 pm (Pacific), 7:00 pm to 8:00 pm (Eastern).
If you want to hear me prattle on about my work, go to http://www.AdrenalineRadio.com and follow the links to The B+ Moviemaking Show.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Anyway, I'm going to be interviewed by Les Szekely for the B+ Moviemaking Radio Show, which as you probably know is about making high quality films for not so much money, which is what I seem to be doing a lot of.
The show airs on Wednesday, May 18, from 4:00 pm to 5:00 pm (Pacific), 7:00 pm to 8:00 pm (Eastern).
If you want to hear me prattle on about my work, go to http://www.AdrenalineRadio.com and follow the links to The B+ Moviemaking Show.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Friday, April 15, 2005
A chance to see 'Burning Passion' in a real, live theater
A lot of people have asked me when they can see 'Burning Passion' on the big screen. Sorry for the short notice, but how about next week?
'Burning Passion' is my film about the guy who ejaculates fire. The film has done pretty well in film festivals:
· Gold Award -- Houston International
· Audience Award -- CrashFest
· Best Directorial Debut -- New York International
· Silver Audience Award -- Crested Butte
· Audience Award -- Melbourne Independent
· Best Comedy -- Newport Beach
Plus a half-dozen awards from other festivals the film was invited to screen in.
Next week it's playing at the Arizona Film Fest. Twice. Tuesday, April 19 at 7:00pm and Saturday, April 23 at 5:00pm. What's especially cool is that they're going to screen a real, live print-- not a digital projection.
Can you make it? Please? I'm going to try to be there.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
'Burning Passion' is my film about the guy who ejaculates fire. The film has done pretty well in film festivals:
· Gold Award -- Houston International
· Audience Award -- CrashFest
· Best Directorial Debut -- New York International
· Silver Audience Award -- Crested Butte
· Audience Award -- Melbourne Independent
· Best Comedy -- Newport Beach
Plus a half-dozen awards from other festivals the film was invited to screen in.
Next week it's playing at the Arizona Film Fest. Twice. Tuesday, April 19 at 7:00pm and Saturday, April 23 at 5:00pm. What's especially cool is that they're going to screen a real, live print-- not a digital projection.
Can you make it? Please? I'm going to try to be there.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Friday, March 25, 2005
Looks like I don't write good enough after all.
Remember that contest I e-mailed you about? The one where they're looking for the next John Carpenter script?
I didn't win. But I did get to be second runner-up, which is the same thing as third place but sounds nicer.
So you won't be seeing John Carpenter directing 'The Lakeside Slasher' anytime soon. Which is a shame. I'm a huge Carpenter fan. And I was really hoping that maybe he would do 'On Top Of The World' for the soundtrack.
Oh well. Maybe I'll just have to go make the damn thing myself.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
I didn't win. But I did get to be second runner-up, which is the same thing as third place but sounds nicer.
So you won't be seeing John Carpenter directing 'The Lakeside Slasher' anytime soon. Which is a shame. I'm a huge Carpenter fan. And I was really hoping that maybe he would do 'On Top Of The World' for the soundtrack.
Oh well. Maybe I'll just have to go make the damn thing myself.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Monday, March 14, 2005
Looks like I can write after all.
I don't know if you know this, but I started out as a writer. And in spite of all the money and accolades and really good parking spots I get from directing, I can't help myself. I write. Still.
A couple years ago, I had an idea for a really twisted script about a hot-headed local kid who wants to murder the asshole college students who come to the lake to party during the summer. All the tits and gore of your typical teen horror film, but with the slasher as the protagonist.
It's called 'The Lakeside Slasher'.
Well, 'The Lakeside Slasher' was just named one of the 13 finalists in a competition to find The Next John Carpenter Movie.
This is the eleventh thing this script has won, which tells me that there are a lot of people who appreciate a totally fucked up story out there. Eleven of them, anyway. And I appreciate them for appreciating it.
I know, now you want to read it. Okay.
First, tell me how much you like me.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
A couple years ago, I had an idea for a really twisted script about a hot-headed local kid who wants to murder the asshole college students who come to the lake to party during the summer. All the tits and gore of your typical teen horror film, but with the slasher as the protagonist.
It's called 'The Lakeside Slasher'.
Well, 'The Lakeside Slasher' was just named one of the 13 finalists in a competition to find The Next John Carpenter Movie.
This is the eleventh thing this script has won, which tells me that there are a lot of people who appreciate a totally fucked up story out there. Eleven of them, anyway. And I appreciate them for appreciating it.
I know, now you want to read it. Okay.
First, tell me how much you like me.
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Another award for 'Burning Passion'. Like you care.
Well, another film festival has seen fit to give an award to 'Burning Passion', my film about the guy who ejaculates fire. For those of you keeping track, that brings the total number of awards to 13.
I won't bore you with the entire list, but here are the more impressive ones:
Gold Award, Houston International Film Festival
Best Comedy, Newport Beach Film Festival
Audience Award, Melbourne Independet Filmmakers Festival
Silver Audience Award, Crested Butte Reelfest
Finalist, Dramatic Category (?), Crested Butte Reelfest
There's a trailer for the film on my site, which is up, but not at 100%. If you want to see the film iteslf, drop me an e-mail. (Not recommended for small children or Catholics.)
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
I won't bore you with the entire list, but here are the more impressive ones:
Gold Award, Houston International Film Festival
Best Comedy, Newport Beach Film Festival
Audience Award, Melbourne Independet Filmmakers Festival
Silver Audience Award, Crested Butte Reelfest
Finalist, Dramatic Category (?), Crested Butte Reelfest
There's a trailer for the film on my site, which is up, but not at 100%. If you want to see the film iteslf, drop me an e-mail. (Not recommended for small children or Catholics.)
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
My work exhibited in the High and Dry Photography Show
Thought you might be interested to know that I was recently invited to show some of my photography work in the High and Dry Photography Show.
The show is a photographic exhibition of landscapes & peoples of the world's dry lands, and the work I contributed was shot in Namibia, among the Himba tribe. The show is going to close on January 21st, so if you're in the Lubbock area before then, stop by the International Cultural Center at Texas Tech and take a look.They're at 601 Indiana Ave.
Of course, you can always go to my site and see a bunch of my photo work, along with other stuff that I find really interesting and maybe you will too. (The site is still under construction, so please don't be too hard on it. But the intro is pretty cool.)
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
The show is a photographic exhibition of landscapes & peoples of the world's dry lands, and the work I contributed was shot in Namibia, among the Himba tribe. The show is going to close on January 21st, so if you're in the Lubbock area before then, stop by the International Cultural Center at Texas Tech and take a look.They're at 601 Indiana Ave.
Of course, you can always go to my site and see a bunch of my photo work, along with other stuff that I find really interesting and maybe you will too. (The site is still under construction, so please don't be too hard on it. But the intro is pretty cool.)
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Monday, December 06, 2004
Hey look! I'm famous. Kind of.
You know that camera filtration gizmo I've been fiddling around with for the past few years?
Well, FastChannel.com did a really sweet article about it. You can read the article at http://creative.fastchannel.com/ccNews/ articleDetail.asp?ArticleID=278.
And if you go to my site you can see stuff I've shot with it. (The site is still under construction, so please don't be too hard on it. But the intro is pretty cool.)
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Well, FastChannel.com did a really sweet article about it. You can read the article at http://creative.fastchannel.com/ccNews/ articleDetail.asp?ArticleID=278.
And if you go to my site you can see stuff I've shot with it. (The site is still under construction, so please don't be too hard on it. But the intro is pretty cool.)
By the way, if you don't want to receive these sporadic updates, please hit the Safe Unsubscribe link and I promise not to send you any more. Really. I hate spam too.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)